Cat Haiku

[Chrisnstar]

Cat Haiku
> > >
> > >
The food in my bowl
Is old, and more to the point
Contains no tuna.
> > >
So you want to play.
Will I claw at dancing string?
Your ankle's closer.
> > >
> > >
There's no dignity
In being sick - which is why
I don't tell you where.
> > >
> > >
Seeking solitude
I am locked in the closet.
For once I need you.
> > >
> > >
Tiny can, dumped in
Plastic bowl. Presentation,
One star; service: none.
> > >
> > >
Am I in your way?
You seem to have it backwards:
This pillow's taken.
> > >
> > >
Your mouth is moving;
Up and down, emitting noise.
I've lost interest.
> > >
> > >
The dog wags his tail,
Seeking approval. See mine?
Different message.
> > >
> > >
My brain: walnut-sized.
Yours: largest among primates.
Yet, who leaves for work?
> > >
> > >
Most problems can be
Ignored. The more difficult
Ones can be slept through.
> > >
> > >
My affection is conditional.
Don't stand up,
It's your lap I love.
> > >
> > >
Cats can't steal the breath
Of children. But if my tail's
Pulled again, I'll learn.
> > >
> > >
I don't mind being
Teased, any more than you mind
A skin graft or two.
> > >
> > >
So you call this thing
Your "cat carrier." I call
These my "blades of death."
> > >
> > >
Toy mice, dancing yarn
Meowing sounds. I'm convinced:
You're an idiot.

[Mary Ann]

LOL! Those are great! ;D

[Frosty M]

ROTFLOL!!!!! Funniest thing I've seen in ages. Thanks!

What's the old saying, "A dog looks at his home and sees his family. A cat looks at his home and sees staff!"

[Mags Mom]

Those have been soundly approved by my feline troops-Dixie, Prissy, Clouseau, Gidget & Nigel!!!!! ;D

Of course the canine troops- Slash, Micro & Sir are put out!! They bought the "Master" theory and now feel jipped!

[Hasha]

I always that that a Haiku was what they left on the floor after eating to much cat food? I hate it when I step in Haiku... yick!