Kind of dirty-minded naughty funny from shopping

[Jenni]

Last week I went to a local farm fleet type store for grain and just inside the door they had a big table of Xmas cards. So I was standing there checking those out and this lady probably in her 60s came pushing her cart behind me. Her husband was a few feet behind her - kind of trying to catch up - and he said something to her that I didn't hear. She turned around and said to him in a loud voice "We're supposed to be here Christmas shopping, not DICK shopping."

I seriously almost died trying not to laugh. I assume her hubby was named Dick and he had just mentioned something he wanted for himself but without the context my dirty mind couldn't help going to the gutter.

Even funnier is that this farm store has a XXX adult party store across the street from it. Hubby told me I should have turned and said to her plainly "the best dick shopping is across the street." Naughty Naughty, LOL.

[AmberC]

OMG I can only imagine if my friends and I had heard a comment like that when we were at the mall the other night! I doubt the laughter would have been able to be contained!

Speaking of funny locations for adult stores...in Fort Wayne, there's a children's resale shop. RIGHT next to it, in the same little strip mall, which only has 2 or 3 stores, was an adult video store. The video store is empty now and has a realtor sign in the window, but you have to wonder how the owner of the resale shop felt about their location. I can't remember which store went in first.

edited because i can't spell

[bluemouse]

*giggle* I have a dirty mind too and I imagine I would have had the exact same reaction. ;D

[Trailpal]

LOL! my hubby is named Dick, and the looks he gets from teen and pre-teen kids when they are introduced is priceless!

[Hasha]

My FIL was named Johnson! The teenagers won't get it but older folks will! ;D

[cowgirlkate]

one night I was watching David letterman, he had real people with funny names, or should I say, "Why did my mother name me this" names!!!! One guy came out and I kid you not. he showed his drivers license. his name was Harry Dick!

[Jenni]

Hey Hasha - My maiden name is Johnson. I was in my late teens when the Big Johnson fad was around. I even had one of the Tshirts myself.

People do need to think a little more when they name their kids. My mom had a classmate who was named Anita Dick, that's just wrong. We have a lady in our church whose last name is Dickaut - pronounced Dick Out - when she got married her husband actually took her last name and got rid of his own, guess he liked being Mr Dick-out, LOL.

I think this situation was so funny because it sounded so wrong when taken out of context. I know she didn't think twice about what she'd said but catching only that part of the conversation just struck me as so funny. A junior high humor kind of moment. I know I occasionally say things in class that come out wrong and kids always pick up on it.

Here's the worst I've done....When I was teaching about how cells split I was drawing the pictures of each stage as we went along. I was using animal cells - which are generally round with a nucleus, generally in the center. As I got to the final stage where you have two new cells I could hear snickering in the class. I looked at my drawing and realized what I was drawing looked just like a pair of boobs. The rest of classes that day I used plant cells, which are more square. Ugg.

[AmberC]

I remember the "Big Johnson" and "Big Ed" shirts. Of course, they were absolutely banned in school, and every year the principal had to remind everyone of the dress code a couple times. He made it very clear that those shirts were not allowed (to the point that we were laughing). One year shortly after one of his speeches, the Christmas edition of the school paper came out. Someone from the paper asked a bunch of random students and staff members what they wanted, and put it in the paper. The last entry was "Mr. Miller: A Big Johnson shirt....(he didn't tell us that, we just know!)" LOL I still remember that. It was so funny. His official response to it was "Haha. Very funny." LOL!

And Jenni, my high school health teacher was trying to draw a picture of the female reproductive organs (internal, uterus, fallopian tubes, etc) and we all laughed because it ended up looking like Bullwinkle!

[Trailpal]

LOL, I always wondered what was behind the name "Johnsonville Brats". I mean how much more phallic can you get? LOL

[Hasha]

Johnson was his first name! ;D I can see it as a last name but a first name??

[dawnh]

LOLOL!!

[KrisAK]

My husband (way before I met him) used to live in Montpelier Idaho which is in the south east corner of the state. There are a couple small towns around there called Dingle and Ovid and Paris to name a few. When he was living there he was into partying - well, everyone was at that time - and when they'd get a new person joining the partying they'd tell them to call the information operator and ask for these two unusually named people that REALLY did exist and REALLY did live in Dingle Idaho. The person doing the calling had to be convinced that they did exist and then that person had to convince the information operator that they weren't pulling her leg. The lady was named Gnerby (Gah-ner-bee) Schnerd (Shh-nerd). And the mans name was Orby (Orr-bee) Fudpucker (Fuhd-pucker). No kidding. These were their names. That was the womans real name. The man had his name legally changed to Orby Fudpucker. He'd go into Dante's bar all the time wearing a pair of Mickey Mouse ears. One day my husband asked him what was up with the name and the ears and he said he did it to "get the ladies". And it worked.

All that was back in the late 70's - early 80's. I tried looking up these people just to see if they were still around but I didn't have any luck.

KrisAK

[Dibblee]

I knew Orby and his girlfriend Max! Small world!