|
|
Post by qhaddict on Jan 18, 2005 10:15:14 GMT -5
 I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with this! I hope everything works out okay. ((HUGS))
|
|
|
|
Post by Mary Ann on Jan 18, 2005 10:30:10 GMT -5
Tricia, this just breaks my heart that you've been put in this position, but thankyou sooo much for being willing to look out for the little ones! They have no other advocate right now besides Child Protective Services, and you. What will you do with two little toddlers? You will cuddle them and referee them, hug them and provide some normalcy and stability in their lives. You'll be sober, you'll make them feel safe. At first they'll probably be good, and then horrible. Love them anyway, no matter what. Their suffering must be great. I'm so sorry this has fallen in your lap, but I am so freaking proud of you for stepping up to the plate and doing the right thing. Your sister will be furious now, but someday will probably thank you, because this will be when she has to face getting straight. Even if she doesn't, your little niece and nephew will thank you for giving them what their mother couldn't, a loving, stable, safe place to grow. As a mom, I thank you for your courage.  |
|
|
|
Post by Chrisnstar on Jan 18, 2005 10:34:42 GMT -5
Oh gosh, Tricia. I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. Meth is an ugly addiction. You did the right thing to get those children out of harm's way.
The next right thing is to get yourself and other members of your family to Alanon or Naranon.
Addiction is a family disease. We all have our own little insane ways of dealing with it and we end up just as sick as the addict or alcoholic. I didn't believe that at first, but it's true. I ended up in the hospital with symptoms of a heart attack because of my worry over living with an addict.
Just remember the three C's...
You didn't Cause it.
You can't Control it.
You can't Cure it.
No matter what anyone says or does, your sister will have to get to recovery in her own way. no one can make her do it. you can't force solutions for her. She will have to hit her own bottom, wherever that is.
I wish you and your family and those precious children the best, Tricia. This is a terrible thing to deal with. It's truly a family disease and everyone is affected.
Good luck. If you want to talk, I'm here via email or PM...
chris
|
|
|
|
Post by Mary Ann on Jan 18, 2005 11:15:12 GMT -5
Please, make sure Amanda hears about those 3C's, and internalizes them. It's not her fault; she should still have a great day. She's a good kid. She'll be a tremendous help. And her aunt's lesson will help shape her life; for the better.  |
|
|
|
Post by Kala on Jan 18, 2005 11:27:04 GMT -5
You are doing a great thing! You could very well be saving their lives. Please know that you and your family are in my prayers (((Hugs))).
|
|
|
|
Post by Sarah on Jan 18, 2005 11:35:32 GMT -5
Tricia,
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Those babies need someone to look out after them when their mother won't. You are a wonderful woman to do this for them and for your sister.
|
|
|
|
Post by Chrisnstar on Jan 18, 2005 12:01:46 GMT -5
Tricia, your sister sounds like my grandson's mother... sigh... while our heart aches for the addicted person, it is the people around them who really suffer.
As young as those children are, they do know what's going on around them and it IS affecting them.
As for the chaos in your lives right now, take it one day at a time, one hour at a time or even one minute at a time if that's what you need to do. And don't be afraid to ask for God's help.
When I quit trying to "fix" my DH and turned him over to God, that's when things started getting better.
We having a saying, Let Go and Let God. and it really does work. Not always in the way we envision, but it works.
chris
|
|
|
|
Post by wildfire on Jan 18, 2005 12:47:55 GMT -5
n/m
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jan 18, 2005 14:31:58 GMT -5
By now I hope this has been addressed by child welfare services. I also hope that it has been worked out for the better. Meth is one of the harder monkeys to wear/bear and really hard to beat. I've had my share of dealing with drug and alchohol abuse. It usually turns great people evil Tricia, your DH is correct that as long as someone keeps taking her kids she will only be a baby maker and not a Mother. But at this point in her life she is not a Mother or doing those children any good. The kids are better off without ANY contact. This will force you sister to do one of a couple of things. A) Get clean and sober b) run off and bury her troubles into another rockC) or make yet another baby to burden you or someone else with. Be sure and express your concerns about the "father" and force the agency to put an order against him. My heart goes out to you, my prayers are with you. I wish I could do more! |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jan 18, 2005 15:33:19 GMT -5
That was fast for DHS I'm impressed! Good job on your part, I'm proud to know you.
You have my prayers and I will send strong prayers for your sister. This is going to a really rough road for her to go down!
Lisa
|
|
|
|
Post by Chrisnstar on Jan 18, 2005 15:39:51 GMT -5
What a mess. Tricia, you have my prayers and lots of them. You are right to tell you mother not to keep giving your sister money. That is enabling and unless the addict/alcoholic HAS to suffer consequences, he or she will never get help.
Good luck.
chris
|
|
|
|
Post by KarenN on Jan 18, 2005 16:53:24 GMT -5
Tricia - I will put you and your situation on our prayer list. This is so very hard - but you ARE doing the right thing, even if no one else is. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}
If you need to talk, please fell free to e-mail me.
Karen @ RockingN.com
|
|
|
|
Post by Mary Ann on Jan 18, 2005 17:19:12 GMT -5
Please tell that man of yours what a great guy he is to take this in stride with such kindness! There'll come a day when you both wonder just what the heck you got yourselves into, because the kids'll be swinging from the chandaliers and running riot. Just think of the alternatives.  I will have these babies, your sister, and you on my prayer list. (((((HUGS))))) |
|
|
|
Post by rhapsody on Jan 18, 2005 17:43:33 GMT -5
Tricia,
If you think you might need them, I have some 4T boys' clothing I can send to you. My youngest is pretty much out of 4T for good now but I do have a few items left (pants, shirts, maybe a jacket or two). Please let me know! You can e-mail me at rhapsody at knology dot net and put something like Boys 4T Clothing in the subject so I'll know it's you (I get LOTS of spam and delete many e-mails unread).
Hugs to you and your DH. God bless you for taking those babies into your home and being there for them.
Crystal meth is dangerous stuff. I hope and pray your sister turns her life around.
Hugs,
Tina
|
|
|
|
Post by Newfygirl on Jan 18, 2005 18:00:39 GMT -5
Always know that you did the right thing. Yeah, your sister will probably be mad, but once she cleans up, I bet she'll thank you for it. (hoping and praying that she'll clean up). You've saved those kids' lives.
|
|
I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with this! I hope everything works out okay. ((HUGS))
